Episodes

12 – I Believe I Can Die

I Believe I Can Die

In episode 12, Anna finds it hard to process good news about her retirement and an invitational FKJ rant from a seasoned listener rocks her mismatched socks off. Laura’s Dad makes his podcast debut and provides meaningful and practical insight into why it’s important to write a will. With helpful reminders to get yourself a sea gull, make yourself a quill, write a rich fancy person will and DON’T SET THE TURTLES ON FIRE, you too will be excited to plan your Viking glitter sled into space burial. Whether you want to be whole or ashes, just let someone know, mmkay!

11 – A Dollar Is All I Need

A Dollar Is All I Need

In episode 11, Laura and Anna doth not take heed of their own advice and both their cards decline during the week. Anna is rich on Wednesday, poor on Thursday and hopes that she shall never run out of toilet paper again. She reminds us not to go hard and fast if you can’t sustain it, wisdom on many levels, and Laura demands that you make your money date and create new dreams out of old dreams that are better dreams. The biggest rant on pockets of all time reminds us of the saddest indictment of modern fashion and Anna says OWN YOUR SHOWER ROUTINE.

10 – If I Was A Rich Girl

If I Was A Rich Girl

Anna walks the walk cat walking and likens her current situation to a beautiful, melancholic analogy involving ropes and lifeboats and drowning. Laura and Anna face retirement with fixed feelings of excitement and dread, because although retirement is gobbledygook and saving is other peoples business, they still want you to build your life raft and be your future you!

9 – Got 99 Problems But Rich Aint One

Got 99 Problems But Rich Ain’t One

TRIGGER WARNING FOR SENSITIVE CONTENT. Laura and Anna reminisce on poor sad people things aka toblerone dinners and rich happy people things aka chest freezers. Getting hit with the hard truth about credit cards and having personal revelations in real-time, this one’s a humdinger! Anna demands that you take your shoulder pads and go be successful at life, reminding us that IT’S NOT LINEAR, LAURA. GOSH.

8 – Spend The Pain Away

Spend The Pain Away

In the second episode on pretty mental money problems, Laura and Anna begin with their usual killjoy rant, this time on Ninja Turtles being named after limbless statues and a request to men to move to the back when it comes to #metoo. Remembering the not-so-better days of expensive Doona covers and making homes in sheds with fancy rich lady matchboxes, we urge you to take on the financial tidal wave, fight that shit and save yo’self. Yas Queens!

7 – Let’s Talk About Money

Let’s Talk About Money

In the first episode of season 2, Laura returns from a holiday, Anna from a breakdown of sorts and Fort Dynamite has had a makeover. A quality feminist rant on workplace gender equality ensues before revelations about spending fat stacks of cash on food and top opp shop purchases. After discussion on the security aspects of wanting to be rich people that reuse their tea bags, we conclude that money causes a constant state of insecurity that we will spend the rest of the season trying to conquer!

Listener Feedback Vol. 1

Listener Feedback Vol. 1

Bonus Episode!

Some of our listeners have told us some nice things that we wanted to share before we launch into Season 2: Pretty Mental Money Problems. Includes flaming bodies falling from buildings, tired angry Anna cupcakes, connecting with muggles, awkie’s high fives and phantom pregnancies. We also review Winchester and the sad glass mystery continues. Thank you, thank you, thank you to all of our listeners for being a part of our fort of feels and please keep telling us your stories!

6 – Would You Like Cries With That?

In the final episode of season 1, Laura is haunted by Tim Tam dreams and Anna is feeling 80% normal although it didn’t stop her from nailing a mystery door shut and trapping someone in an office. Discussion takes a twist to filming on poo farms but is generally about the hangry hell on wheels that periods can bring into our lives. We haven’t really figured out this topic yet and are hoping for some audience feedback on what it is that makes periods so damn disruptive and frustrating. Special episode on Listener Feedback Vol. 1 out next week!

5 – Emotional Enema & Merchants of Madness

Laura and Anna take heed of naked toilet wisdom to put their complex little selves back together again. They say no way to nunneries and swinging chairs and thank the almighty spaghetti monster that their brains will NOT be getting scrambled with ice picks. NO SIR, NOT TODAY. (Laura is also very sorry about the audio, which has been fixed for future episodes).

4 – Supermassive Black Hole

A Supermassive Black Hole

Laura and Anna try to go deep into the abyss that is depression. Discussion includes how to stay on the edge of the black hole and not drown like Virginia Woolf, Anna feeling dead on the inside and not buying stuff, Laura’s tit confetti and inability to pronounce plurals as well as sick days, dance therapy and malfunctioning anxiety. Phew!

If any of this episode causes distress or concern, please contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 or at www.lifeline.org.au or contact your health care professional.